The Art of Commenting (Discussion Post)

I think most bloggers would agree that the role of comments in our community is an extremely important one. We want to know that we are being heard. We want to connect. We want to feel validated after spending (sometimes way too long) on a particular blog post. In this new world of social media, which I'm especially sensitive to since I'm teaching a modern media class this semester, we want to see that our picture has been "liked" and know that our opinion matters.

I love comments. I do. Especially on reviews, which take so much more time to write than throwing together a Waiting on Wednesday or Stacking the Shelves post. A good review takes work. You have to find a way to be interesting and entertaining while explaining your thoughts on somebody else's work. The book blogging community has exploded and people can go anywhere to read a review. That's what makes it so amazing when somebody reads yours AND takes the time to comment about it. I will never take that for granted.

I feel so lucky to have made some wonderful blogger friends. There are a few people who take the time to comment on almost, if not all, of the blog posts I put up. These people are awesome and I love them. Because these people are awesome, I make a point to return the favor, like any good friend would. No matter how busy I get, I always try to make my way over to the blogs of those who've taken the time to comment on mine. Not out of obligation, but because I want to know what my friends are up to. What did they just finish reading? What are they thinking about today? That's the community I want to be a part of, but it isn't always the one that exists.

Sorry, but it is going to get a bit rant-y from here on out...

First, there are few things I hate more than disingenuous comments. Comments that bloggers leave for the sole purpose of getting you to come to their blog and follow. Case in point, this was left on a review of a book that I didn't like very much. At all. Where I went in to great detail the issues I had with it:

          This looks really intriguing, gonna have to read this for sure! Anyways I just wanted to say that your blog is so cute! I have been reading your reviews and now have like 5 book in my TBR shelve on goodreads so thank you for that! Im a new blogger and would love for you to check out my blog @ ____________
I would really appreciate the followers!



Ok, so she obviously didn't read the review, which isn't a horrible crime (although, seriously, read the review if you're going to comment--don't be a dick), but I've seen this comment from said blogger on NO LIE at least 50 blogs. You probably know exactly who I'm talking about because she probably left this exact comment on your blog. I'm sure she is a lovely person, but it's the most disingenuous thing ever. 

I like to see my follower numbers go up as much as the next blogger, but that isn't why I'm a blogger. I started this blog because I like writing reviews and connecting with other awesome readers, NOT to gain as many followers as possible like some deranged cult leader. That isn't to say I haven't left messages, especially when I first started out, saying: hey, I followed your blog and I'd love it if you'd follow back, because I have. What I've never done and will never do is leave some mass comment that I copy and paste on every blog I visit. I don't want to "connect" with bloggers who are only concerned about their numbers. I don't care. 

On the flip-side, I can't help but sometimes feel completely shafted when I bloggers don't respond to my comments. If a blogger doesn't respond to any comments, it doesn't bother me, but there have been a couple of incidents where I've swung back by a blog after leaving a real comment only to see that the blogger has responded to other comments, but not mine.

For example, I left a comment on a blog where the author is a teacher. She had posted pictures of her room and was talking about gearing up for the first day of school. I left a comment about how cute her decorations were and how about I was about to embark on my student teaching semester, blah, blah, blah. I went back a couple of days later to see if that had started a conversation and she had commented on the one other comment about her decorations, but hadn't responded to my comment. Seriously, WTF is that?! It gave me flashbacks to 6th grade when I wasn't "cool enough" for the mean girls to talk to.

It's the reason my favorite blogs are some of the (relatively) smaller ones. I understand that it is hard to visit every person who visits you when you have a million followers and get 50 comments for every post. I do. And I understand that you may respond to people differently. Some of the people who comment are going to be people you really like and are truly friends with while others are just random people who drop by in an attempt to get you to come over to their blog, but I do think that people will stop following you or reading your posts if you don't ever respond to what they have to say and/or you don't ever come over to see what they are writing about.

If I comment on any comments of a post, I comment on them all (the exception to this is WoW posts--because really what is there to say? I'm glad you're excited to read this, too. Thanks for saying I've picked a great book). It's just rude not to.  That is why I tend not to comment on meme posts: it can be tedious, especially when the comments are super bland, but I want my little space to be a friendly one. Because I'm a friendly girl. I can't even imagine wanting to hurt another blogger's feelings--and I'm sure it's not even about wanting to hurt feelings, but again, it's just common courtesy.

Alright, rant over. I want to hear what you think! Do you respond to comments? Do you ever just respond to select comments or do you respond to all of them? Do you go back and look to see if a blogger has responded to your comment?

I promise to respond if you leave a comment. :)